The Top 8 Discipline Mistakes Parents Make

 Big discipline mistakes you might be making (and how to fix them)

You know the drill: You give your child an ultimatum—"Get dressed or we're staying home!"—and naturally she says, "Okay, we'll stay home!" Might as well plant a big "L" on your forehead. We all see our discipline efforts backfire on occasion (hey, you're tired!), and of course there are those battles just not worth fighting (no kid ever flunked preschool because his teeth were furry). But you do need to prove you're the parent at least some of the time. Learning to avoid these discipline land mines can help you hop to it.

Way to Blow It #1: Tell a Big Ole Lie

"My two-year-old daughter, Chloe, fights me about going to her babysitter's house every Monday," says New Jersey mom Gina Kane. One morning when Chloe refused to get out of the car, "I pointed to the house next door and told her it was a daycare center run by the caveman from the Geico commercials, which really scare her," says Kane. "I said she had a choice: Go to the sitter's house or to the caveman's daycare." Mission accomplished—Chloe dashed to the sitter's door. Fast-forward a week: The babysitter casually asked Kane if she knew of a daycare center in the neighborhood because her daughter couldn't stop talking about it. "I was mortified having to explain, and Chloe now thinks that all daycare centers are run by cavemen," Kane admits. "I'm in big trouble if I ever actually have to send her to daycare."

A Better Way

Little white lies are so tempting in a pinch. You might even get away with them sometimes. Another mom had a great run while her toddler was afraid of a local clown named Macaroni. Whenever he refused to cooperate, she'd just say, "Maybe we should get Macaroni!" and the little guy would immediately don his pj's or gobble his carrots. But as Kane found out, scare tactics can and do come back to bite you in the butt, so it's best to be honest, says Bonnie Maslin, author of Picking Your Battles. Kane could have said instead, "I know sometimes you don't want to go to your babysitter. Sometimes I don't want to go to work." Empathizing would have made the Monday-morning transition easier.

Way to Blow It #2: Back Down

You want a surefire way to make sure your kids never listen to you? Threaten but don't act. My daughter Ella and I recently went for a playdate at a friend's house, where the little girl kept snatching away whatever toy Ella picked up. Her mom would say, "Give that back to Ella or I'll take it away," and then turn back to our conversation. Of course, as soon as Ella moved on to another toy, the little girl wanted that one.

A Better Way

It's no fun to be the bad guy, but if a child acts out, there has to be a consequence. "Repeatedly saying 'If you don't stop throwing sand, I'm going to make you leave the sandbox' won't stop the bad behavior," says Bridget Barnes, coauthor of Common Sense Parenting for Toddlers and Preschoolers. "What your child hears is 'I can keep doing this a few more times before Mom makes me stop.'"
Instead, give a warning, and then, if your child does it again, give an immediate consequence such as a time-out. If he continues, leave. The next time, a gentle reminder should do the trick: "Remember how we had to leave when you threw the sand? I hope we don't have to go home early again today."

Way to Blow It #3: Dis Dad (or Vice Versa)

When Polly Lugosi and her husband, Jim, take their two kids, Zoe, 5 and Miles, 2, out for a treat, this Milwaukie, OR, couple tells them that they have to behave or they won't get it. "Unfortunately, my husband is a complete pushover and always gives them the treat even if they act up," says Polly.

A Better Way

Even though Jim doesn't mean to undermine Polly's efforts, that's exactly what he's doing. Showing a united front won't just help your child behave better, it'll also prevent you from feeling like the bad guy all the time. "If you and your husband prefer to use different punishments, that's okay—just as long as there are consequences for the same actions," says Nancy Schulman, coauthor of Practical Wisdom for Parents: Demystifying the Preschool Years. When your child is out of earshot, create a list of rules and discuss different options, she says.

Way to Blow It #4: Bribe a Little Too Often

"My two-year-old daughter, Isabelle, has never been a great eater," says Liz Samuel, a mom in Montclair, NJ. "So I once offered her a piece of chocolate if she would just finish her lunch." The reward worked perfectly: Isabelle ate her chicken and sweet-potato fries—but then she demanded another treat at dinnertime. "Now, whenever I want her to eat, she asks for either chocolate or a lollipop," complains the mom. "Plus, she'll eat just one fry and then expect her treat."

A Better Way

We all need to keep a good bribe up our sleeves—to get through the grocery store, a church service, or that new episode of Mad Men you had to TiVo because you were too whipped to stay up for it. But the experts insist that reinforcing good behavior is a better way to go. "So instead of saying 'If you're good at Grandma's today, I'll buy you a toy,' try 'I'm really proud of you for sitting so nicely during dinner at Grandma's,'" advises Maslin. And don't underestimate the power of disappointment. "Saying 'I'm really sad you broke the present Daddy gave me' makes a child feel appropriately bad about his behavior," says Maslin. "You may feel like a terrible parent in the moment, but you're actually helping your child develop a conscience."

Way to Blow It #5: Break Your Own Rules

When Anne Wear's 2-year-old son, Brandon, would do things he shouldn't—take his mom's car keys or pull books off the shelf, for example—this High Point, NC, mom would slap his hand and say "No, sir!" in a harsh tone of voice. "It worked great," she says, "until his preschool teacher caught him slapping the hands of any child who took his toy or cut in front of him in line!" Wear quickly realized that she couldn't say it was wrong for Brandon to smack his friends' hands when she and her husband, Brian, were doing the same thing to him. "We switched to time-outs," says Wear.

A Better Way

Not only are kids little mimics, emulating your bad behaviors, but they'll call you on it, as Suzi Dougherty found out. Her 2-year-old, Will, knows that throwing toys in the house is a definite no-no. "But one day my husband, Chris, threw a dog toy into the next room, just to get it out from underfoot," says this Newburgh, NY, mom. "Will immediately ordered him into a time-out! Since then, we try to be more careful and follow our own rules," she says. "But on the plus side, at least it showed us that the 'no throwing toys' rule is starting to sink in!"

Way to Blow It #6: Lose It

Taking care of an active toddler requires a lot of patience. But there are times when Gabrielle Howe of Staten Island, NY, finds herself at the end of her rope when dealing with 2-year-old Thea. "One particularly trying day I completely lost it and yelled at Thea," admits this working mom. "She then tried to send me to my room!"

A Better Way

Time-outs aren't just for kids—they work great for adults, too. "Give yourself permission to walk away," says Schulman. "Take a deep breath, count to ten, and then you'll be much more effective when disciplining your child." Walk into another room if you need to, as long as your child is safe in his crib or a childproofed room. "If you can't leave your child alone, then you should both go into another room," she adds. "Often a change of scenery will help you both cool off." If your husband or a friend is around, just say "I need a break, can you handle this one?" suggests Schulman. And remember that kids are expert at pushing your buttons, but if you can avoid letting the situation escalate by giving one warning and then an immediate consequence, it may help keep you both calm.

Way to Blow It #7: Wait Too Long

Recently I was stuck in traffic with my 2-year-old daughter, Ella, when she started getting fidgety and tried to wiggle out of her car seat. Frustrated by both the slow trip home and the endless rounds of "Row, row, row your boat," I told her that if she didn't put her buckle back on correctly, she wouldn't get to have a bedtime story that night—a technique that works great when my daughter's procrastinating about getting into her pajamas or brushing her teeth before bed. This time, though, bedtime was hours away—and the threat pretty much meaningless. Ella didn't stop playing with her seat buckle, and it seemed pointless to remind her about it hours later when she was getting ready for bed.

A Better Way

"Kids don't remember what they did wrong an hour after the fact, never mind the next day," says Barnes. "You want to show them the consequences of their actions as close to the bad behavior as possible." If your child hits a friend with a toy truck, don't cancel tomorrow's playdate—just take away the truck.

Way to Blow It #8: Talk On... and On... and On

My husband, Patrick, tends to launch into long explanations with Ella, like how going to sleep is a good idea because she'll feel well rested for our upcoming busy day at Grandma's house. Tempting as it can be to try and reason with a young child, you might as well be speaking gibberish.

A Better Way

"Kids are not mini-adults," says Barnes. "Long explanations or instructions go right over their heads." Saying "No cookies before dinner" is enough to get the point across; you can skip the lecture about how sweets will spoil a tiny appetite. Keep your words age-appropriate, too. "I had one parent who was tired of always telling his son to stop whining," says Barnes. "Then one day his child finally asked, 'What's whining?'" It's okay to use a term like whining as long as you explain what you mean: "I can't understand you when you whine. Please use your big-boy voice."

Getting Back on Track

You gave a warning, then caved in. Or you yelled at your kid- for yelling at you. Below, how to fix your own bad behavior, from Nancy Schulman, coauthor of Practical Wisdom for Parents.

Get Over It

"We all make mistakes," says Schulman. "Don't beat yourself up. Just say 'I know I said—or did—something I shouldn't have. Let's try to all follow these rules from now on.'"

Take it Slow

Even if you feel like your discipline techniques need to be completely overhauled, pick two of your top issues and start there. Don't overwhelm your child with 20 new rules. "Sit down when he's calm and go over the rules so he knows what's expected of him," says Schulman.

Work Around It

Let's say your child always has a tantrum over what to eat for breakfast. Rather than duke it out each morning, offer your child just two choices—say, cereal or eggs—so he can still feel in control.

Give it Time

"It takes time to undo a pattern of bad behavior," notes Schulman. "If you start being consistent, they'll catch on. It may take ten or twenty times, but they'll get it."

Learning More on A Billion Entrepreneurs

A Billion Entrepreneurs has triggered a global crusade, in the aim of raising awareness to the people and allowing everyone to become part of the campaign all over the world. No matter if you have got any prior experience in the field of entrepreneurship or not, there is a lot to fully comprehend right from the start from this campaign. As you will come to realize, as soon as you have accessed the YouTube channel of the people working for the global crusade, there are many people who have already embraced the concept of such action.

In order for the campaign to be successful, a lot of motivational videos have been brought to light. As a consequence, a lot of people who were completely unaware of the idea of entrepreneurship came to understand why it is beneficial to be able and take actions, without ever needing to depend on others. The action of being free to do something on your own and not comply with the demands of others is truly challenging and this is what has been the cornerstone of A Billion Entrepreneurs.

On the YouTube videos, you will be able to come up with valuable pieces of information, as well as behind the scenes footage and additional details that have made the most out of entrepreneurship and the benefits that it can provide to professionals. There has been global attention drawn to the movie, including the quintessence of such actions and the actual profit that you can get out of this movement.
The global crusade has got an ultimate goal, which is no other than the accomplishment to get on late night TV. Moving in this very direction, the people behind the efforts of A Billion Entrepreneurs have been thorough and detailed towards uploading motivational videos, full of intriguing facts and solid pieces of information on the deeper meaning of entrepreneurship.

Once you get to realize that through entrepreneurship you can reach out to yourself and find the purpose that will fulfill your needs and meet your criteria in full, you will come to understand that this is what you have been lacking so far in life. In other words, without the proper action that has to do with your prosperity and growth through the optimal actions triggered by yourself, you can never feel accomplished over time. The long term goal is of course the achievement to establish one entrepreneur in every single home. After having completed such a task, everything will run more smoothly and people will feel a lot happier.

If you wish to learn more about the movement of A Billion Entrepreneurs and if you want to keep up to date with the global crusade, you can check out the official website and the YouTube channel that refers to such efforts. Even the slightest donation will be adequate to help out towards reaching such a goal. So, make sure to consider such an option. Have fun and try out searching for the deepest desire of yours professionally.

About Inequality in America

As we all know the rich get richer and the poor gets poorer in America. That’s the way it seems like it has been for a long time. And the trend seems to be continuing. Although rich people took a hit in the financial crisis, the stock market has recovered strongly. Income inequality has been on the rise since the late 1970s, but the economic and financial crisis of 2008 instigated an unemployment epidemic that dramatically compounded this problem in the United States and catapulted the issue to the center of debate. There is wide agreement across the political spectrum that high inequality is contributing to undesirable circumstances such as stagnant household income, rising poverty rates, and increased borrowing and debt, though there is much less agreement on remedies. A bedrock American principle is the idea that all individuals should have the opportunity to succeed on the basis of their own effort, skill, and ingenuity. —Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/new-charts-about-inequality-2011-11?op=1#ixzz3GCxAbb8G But still once again the rich are getting richer as the poor get poorer in America. But Main Street has not: Median household income has fallen 10% since the beginning of the recession and unemployment has increased by nearly 5 percentage points. The Populist movements among Democrats and Republicans have finally put this issue in the spotlight. If you haven’t seen any charts about inequality, then prepare to have your mind blown. Here are some charts about the facts of inequality in America from 2011 and that trend has continued in 2014. Read more: http://www.businessinsider.com/new-charts-about-inequality-2011-11?op=1#ixzz3GCyHl5Zx Inequality in America provides a snapshot of the issues posed by the growing concentrations of income, focusing on the United States but drawing on international comparisons to help set the context. Here is the URL link http://www.amazon.com/Inequality-America-Trends-International-Perspectives/dp/0815724217/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1413368231&sr=8-2&keywords=inequality+in+america                                                                      of a book about inequality in America that’s featured on Amazon written by Un Dadush and Kemal Dervis. The authors examine the economic, technological, and political drivers of inequality and identify worrying trends associated with its rise. They demonstrate how specific factors have exacerbated income inequality, including technological change, international trade, changes in labor market participation, and the increasing role of the financial sector. Their clear and concise exposition makes the issues surrounding income distribution accessible to a wider public. As they write in the conclusion: “We have argued that tackling the worst effects of inequality and re-establishing a measure of equal opportunity requires increased investment in crucial public goods: first, education; second, a more progressive and simplified tax system; and third, increased international cooperation to avoid a race to the bottom. Education, tax, and other such policies are pursued by other highperforming advanced countries and can be shaped for the United States in a way that is fully consistent with an efficient and competitive American economy.” There has been inequality in America for a long time. And there is an inequality in wealth in America also. Check out this video below. Wealth Inequality in America

 This superb six-minute video builds on pioneering research about American attitudes toward wealth by economists Michael Norton and Dan Ariely. Most Americans, the research shows, would like to see wealth in the United States much more equally distributed than they believe it is. But most Americans underestimate how staggeringly unequal the United States has become. Thanks to politizane on YouTube.

– See more at: http://inequality.org/wealth-inequality-america/#sthash.3Gj5tJm3.dpuf

Nothing is Impossible

People may say that you are a dreamer. However, just because it is a dream does not mean it cannot become a reality tomorrow. Nothing is Impossible. If you believe in yourself, you can be success in anything you want.

For some people, this is easy. They are confident in their abilities and will strive to make their dreams come true no matter what happens. For other people, this is hard. They are plagued by self doubt and negative influences. This hinders them from even considering the possibility of turning a dream into reality.

So how do you make the impossible possible?

Nothing is impossible if you believe. That old saying, "If you believe it, you can achieve it," says it all. You have to envision your goals. It does not matter if your goals are professional or personal. Belief and faith in yourself is key to erasing the word impossible from your vocabulary.
The first step to believing nothing is impossible if you choose to be a success. This might seem redundant to some people, but many times people are their only obstacle to gaining success. Being successful is a choice. You can wallow in self doubt or you can be optimistic. There is a lot a positive attitude can do to help you.

Nothing is impossible if you stop doubting yourself and your abilities. You can do this by listing your fears and attacking them. You have to become proactive and face your fears. What do you perceive as your shortcomings? Work to improve them. When you do this, you will increase your confidence. More confidence equals a more secure you. Therefore, you will stop doubting yourself and gain faith in your abilities to accomplish your dreams. This is crucial step to having obtaining a positive attitude.

Another way to remain optimistic during your journey is to let go of negative influences in your life, because nothing is impossible if you purge your life of negativity. Whether it is yourself or friends and family, you need to have positive influences in your life. If someone is bringing negative energy into your life, you should remove them from your life or try to change the relationship between the two of you. Unresolved issues can be the source of a lot of negativity. Just like your fears, you need to be proactive and resolve your issues. If you cannot, let go and seek out healthy relationships between yourself and the other people around you.

What does it mean to be proactive?

Nothing is impossible if you overcome procrastination. As Benjamin Franklin has said, "You may delay, but will not." If you have a dream you, should You do not have to have your goal on your mind 24/7, but do not waste time keeping your goals in the dream phase. You need to actively work to move your dreams forward. Nothing can happen if you do not learn how to follow through on your dreams. Nothing comes from inaction. To avoid procrastination, you need to take immediate action and keep it consistent.

Therefore, nothing is impossible if you do your best. Your best is enough. You should do your best in everything that you do on a daily basis. This will prepare you for when you become a success. To do your best, you have to stretch your yourself and get out of your comfort zone. Do not box yourself into a bubble. Expand your horizons and your expectations. Also, you cannot do your best unless you are willing to stretch the amount of work you do and stretch your imagination.

Nothing is impossible if you put in the work. Imagination and dreams are free, but it will take some elbow grease to turn your dreams to reality.You cannot fully appreciate making the impossible possible without putting in hard work. You have to do your research. The more you know, the more you can achieve. For example, if you have a dream of opening your own restaurant, but you have never worked in a restaurant in your life. Get to work. You can go back to school to learn about running a restaurant and/or you can get hands on experience by obtaining a job at a similar restaurant.

Nothing is impossible when you do your research. This needs to be reiterated, because good research is the root to making a plausible plan. You cannot blindly rely on luck and circumstances. Let's go back to the restaurant example. If you find out during your research that thousands of new restaurants fail within the first year, would you still be motivated to open a restaurant during these economic times? Do not get discouraged. Your goal is to make your research work for you. What are the main reasons the restaurants are failing? Is it because of the economy, bad customer service or poor management? You need to find all the problems people face when opening up a restaurant and find solutions to handle these problems. You need a plan A, B, C and sometimes D if you want to succeed.

Nothing is impossible when you are dedicated to a plan. The key to success is to make a logical plan and stick to it. It might need to be adapted along the way, but the foundation of the plan should remain the same. Your plan has to make the "impossible" possible. Do not get discouraged when you hit a stumbling block. You need to remain committed.

Nothing is impossible when you accept failure. This might sound absurd, but failures are a big part of your learning curve. Do not be stopped by your stumbles. You journey to success will be plagued by trials. A failure does not mean you have to throw out a white flag. Each stumble is a growing pain that allows you to grow. Failures prepare you for success.

This is a journey for you. It might be plaque with ups and down, but in the end, you want to be proud of what you accomplished. Knowing that you did your best and put in hard work makes the journey satisfying. Remember, Nothing is Impossible so get to work achieving what you believe.